Lessons I Learned By 50

I give thanks for turning “50 Fine”.
Fifty is an age that is “tricky” for most women.  Very few women I know will bring attention publicly to their 50th birthday.  Well, y’all already know I dance to my own beat. I am very excited about turning 50. So much so that I had to remind myself to be present during my 49th year.
The truth is my 30s were a blur to me. I was not happy, as I had not confronted my past trauma. During those years, I fought to build a name for myself in business, I was raising young children,  one of whom was diagnosed with autism, I was fighting breast cancer, we migrated to a new country and started all over.
It seems like I was always fighting for something. Society also makes you feel as a woman that “struggle is a right of passage.”  I have had to retrain my mind to understand that ‘living well’ is my “right of passage. ”

Today, I am standing in a place in my life where I don’t have to fight for a thing. I can tick off 99% of the goals I set for myself prior to age 50. More than anything, my life is filled with peace, joy, and happiness.  I made it. Thank you, God. My life is a movie. I give thanks for my fabulous husband, beautiful sons, my supportive relatives, and loyal friends. I could not have done this without them.
I now know what matters; what makes me happy; who my real friends are; what I should buy and what, and who no longer feeds my soul.

Somewhere, along this journey,  I discovered the power that gratitude and positive thinking have on my life. Spirituality became more important to me than religion.  Vulnerability, authenticity, and positive thinking became my superpower. I am able to face my truth. I am ok with my past mistakes and trauma, and I feel empathy towards those persons responsible for my growing pains. I am the same person in every room I enter. I am comfortable with who I am, so I don’t have to adjust to suit the occupants of the room.

What have I learned during the past 50 years?
Time is more valuable than money. You can always make more money, but you cannot add more time to your stay here on earth. Everybody does not deserve your time. Spend more time doing what you love, with the people you love and the people who love you.
Your youth does not matter if you are alive but not living because you are as young as the quality of the life you are living.
It is ok to have fun.Make every day count.
Work hard, but play harder.
Focus on doing what you love well, and then success will follow.
Teach people how to treat you by how you treat yourself. You either teach them to take you for granted or treat you well. If someone is saying they are too busy to connect with you, they are, in fact, saying you are not a priority to them. Call that same person and say, “I have a check for a million dollars for you.” You will see how busy they really are.
I am a spiritual being, not a religious being. God is everywhere, not just in church.
People generally don’t remember the many things you have done for them. They only remember the one thing you did not do.
I am exactly where I am supposed to be in my life. No one is better than me, and I am not better than anyone. I am simply better than who I was yesterday.

To make a long story short, I am grown and sexy. 50 is the beginning of my freedom to do what I want and a chance to start over and become a happier version of myself. Now that I got the mistakes out of the way,  it’s  time to make “shit” happen. I have been rehearsing for 50 years. Time for the live performance. Y’all aren’t ready for the 5.0 version of Basia. Everything that God put me on this planet to receive is mine. Receive that.
I don’t believe in failure. Failure is practice for success. Everything happens as it is supposed to be. As I said before in my book, Thirty Days To Lasting Happiness , “God never takes anything from me without giving me better.”
I totally understand that I am not for everybody. And that is okay. I will not dim my light for anyone. I deserve the best. The glow you see on the outside is what is what God has placed in the inside.  I can honestly say that I am the best version of myself.  Many people did not live to see their 50th birthday.  I feel incredibly blessed and grateful that I am still walking on this planet. I am 50 Fine. God is the greatest. 

Cheers to 50 more years of a happier me.

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